Holding Hands in the Journey of Life to Heaven.
“Please ask Jesus to help me,” she cried out in despair, her voice cutting through the quiet night. Looking into her fearful eyes and at her trembling hands gripping my clothes, which also wrinkled my heart, I wondered, is this the girl I know? (I am a religious teacher for this young woman.)
Over four years ago, she had a radiant smile and cheeks as red as apples, happy about becoming a mother and full of hope for the future. Now, her hair was messy, her eyes red from crying, and she urgently wanted to know, where is Jesus? On the other side of the table, her partner was full of anger, banging on the table and shouting.
What turned a once loving couple into constant fighters? Was it money problems, issues with raising their children, difficulties with in-laws, or communication problems in their marriage? I wanted to understand.
“God said, ‘It is not good for man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.’ And man said, ‘This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh…’” (Genesis 2:18, 23). The love between spouses is based on God’s love, because God first loved us. He created men and women in His own image and blessed them, creating marriage and giving it a purpose: to support and love each other.
As Genesis records, Satan intended to ruin the close relationship between God and people, tempting Adam and Eve to sin and challenge God’s power and wisdom. But even in His anger, God, full of compassion and mercy, made garments of skin to cover their nakedness. God’s love for humanity never stopped, and we need to learn from that. Isn’t the conflict between spouses just a repeat of Satan’s tactics in Genesis? Everyone is quick to blame, but how many try to emulate God’s tolerance and mercy?
When you lose your temper, everyone could clearly see and hear the devil speaking through you, “I almost made them break up, it was almost successful…” and “I want to enter her, make her angry, doubtful, and jealous, intentionally saying things to provoke her husband…” Jesus’ mercy exposed the devil’s intentions and showed us Satan’s evil nature, always stirring hearts, creating conflict, and tempting people away from God’s commands. “Be angry, and do not sin”: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil.” (Ephesians 4:26-27).
Spouses should respect and treat each other sincerely. Although disagreements are inevitable, they shouldn’t turn into fights. Remembering the good in each other can reveal God’s love, rather than focusing on faults and falling into Satan’s traps.
When you say things like, “I don’t want to pray, sing, or go to church…” it is disturbing. How could you, usually so eager for church and worship, suddenly become so averse to God? This shows that when one is angry, their spirit is overtaken by dark forces from Satan. If you know it is wrong to speak like that, and you continue to do so, then the Holy Spirit would leave, and you find yourself without the strength to resist. How can there be love in a heart filled with hate? When you give a foothold to the evil one, how can God’s Spirit dwell in your heart?
When you look across the table, with flames in your eyes so intense they seem to burn everyone present, it is clear these flames come from deep-seeded anger in your heart, a hellish fire fueling your anger. “Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.” (1 Peter 3:7). Because she is weaker, not only should you respect her, but also protect and accommodate her, not burn her with the fires of hell or intimidate her with angry words.
Your wife is bone of your bones, flesh of your flesh, tailor-made by God for you. Though misunderstandings may occur, and you haven’t committed any fatal sins against the commandments, it’s clear you haven’t fulfilled your duty to love your wife as your own body (Ephesians 5:28), nor have you followed Jesus’ command to love your neighbor as yourself. Her weakness is your own; why keep blaming someone so closely connected to you?
Lack of mutual understanding and genuine care in speech and actions might be the main reasons for the tension in your marriage. Calm down, throw away the sour past. Why carry this rotten burden that only weighs down the gracious gift of life you both share?
Perhaps other family and financial factors are straining your relationship, but with mutual accommodation, rational and calm communication, and avoiding idle gossip, you can rediscover the initial love that brought you together. If God dwells in us and our love for Him is made complete, everything will have hope, right? Watching you both disappear into the long night, I feel a pang of sadness knowing the journey back is long, just like the rugged path you must continue to travel together.
May the true light of the Lord guide you safely home and together greet the coming dawn. If God’s love dawns in your hearts, nothing is insurmountable.
We warmly invite you to come to the Chicago True Jesus Church’s Fall Evangelical Service and Spiritual Convocation in September. Let’s learn how and what it takes to hold God’s hand in the journey of life and then hold your loved one’s hand. Peace and joy will come inevitably.
Thursday, September 26,2024 6:50PM to 8:10PM
Friday and Saturday, September 27-28, 2024 9:00AM to 8:10PM
Sunday, September 29, 2024, 9:00AM to 1:00PM
Complimentary lunch and dinner will be served.
Please find our church location as follows:
True Jesus Church
4N550 Church Road
Bensenville, IL 60106
Google Maps
In the meantime, please feel free to join us for our regular Sabbath (Friday evening and Saturday) services online or in-person.
Friday Evening Service: 7:50PM – 9:00PM
Saturday Morning Service: 10:50AM – 12:00Noon
Saturday Afternoon Service: 1:30PM – 2:40PM
Email us at ilovejesus@tjc-chicago.org